Songfic; I'm never gonna know you now....

Songfic
Song: Waltz, by Elliot Smith
Characters: Chelsea Lingersheen, Alois Trancy
Summary: Instead of being a shinigami, she was just mortal. An immortal Alois returns years later to find a proper woman instead of the Lingersheen Lord. Every day could be her last with the human trafficking coming to an end. AU
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First the mic then a half cigarette
Singing 'Cathy's Clown'
That's the man she's married to now
That's the girl that he takes around town

It was a Sunday, he realized as he watched the silly mortals walk out of the church. He was looking for that particular face of the girl he loved, the only girl that knew about them. What he found, was no girl. It was a woman, grown up, married, in a grey dress. She was at a man’s side, green eyes dimmed, as if there was no fun in living anymore. He was talking to another nobleman. The usual shade was following her, a blank look on his face.

She appears composed, so she is, I suppose
Who can really tell?
She shows no emotion at all
Stares into space like a dead china doll

“And is everything set for the party, my dearest?” the nobleman at her side asked. She nodded.
“We are ready to receive the guests tomorrow” she replied. Her voice had never changed, but her speech pattern was more refined, more feminine. Lifeless, dull, plain boring. Emotionless. It scared him. She was not supposed to be like that. She was to be fierce, strong, unbreakable. He led her into the carriage, chatting with his fellow nobleman while she sat there with her hands in the lap of her dress. Staring into space.

I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow

Now she's done and they're calling someone
Such a familiar name
I'm so glad that my memory's remote
Cause I'm doing just fine hour to hour, note to note

He knew that there was almost no human trafficking left. It was probably what she was waiting for. To be free of this life, free of sensation. The sensation of being trapped in your life. The demon was sitting across from her, looking like a marionette. It seemed that his enjoyment of this contract had been gone when his lady’s passion for life had. It broke his heart to see her like this. She was like some sort of doll. He was glad that the first few memories, the memories of his mortal life, where overshadowed by the sensation to the kill, of the scorching fire of someone’s life burning down his throat. That the memories of that strong girl did not and could not kill him more.

Here it is, the revenge to the tune
"You're no good,
You're no good you're no good you're no good"
Can't you tell that it's well understood?

It was only a few days later that she was alone, sewing some mindless pattern. She hurt herself and cursed softly, glancing around. A spark of how she used to be. He watched her through the window, the huge glass window as she sat in the chair. After a few moments, she leaned back in her chair, sighing and dropping her handiwork. He knew that she was hurting. He knew he was hurting himself by watching her. How could’ve hoped that she would have remained the same girl? Ten years was a long time. She had probably forgotten him, or his sister and her lover. Especially when the only tie left to that world was barely more than a shade, a puppeteer entering the final stage of his current show.

I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow

I'm here today and expected to stay on and on and on
I'm tired
I'm tired

She shivered as she sat in the bed, reading a book. He was spying on her. Dressed in a white nightgown. Her green eyes even more dimmed as she sat there, hopelessly alone. He felt for her. His heart was breaking, and it was tiring him to see the one he had loved like nothing more than a shell. The soul, he knew, had no appetite anymore.

Looking out on the substitute scene
Still going strong
XO, Mom
It's ok, it's alright, nothing's wrong

They told him to move on, to stop torturing himself by watching her. Warned him not to show himself to her. It would break them even more. He told him he was strong enough, that he would not be tempted. Assured them that all was right.

Tell Mr. Man with impossible plans to just leave me alone
In the place where I make no mistakes
In the place where I have what it takes

It’s time to move on, he told them. They told him that they would stay for two more days, for some show both of them had wanted to see. He agreed. The last two days he would spend around her. The last few glances. He wouldn’t show himself, he promised. Glances were shared. They knew him. They couldn’t do more than hope.

I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow

He would never know what would happen to her. He would never know at which age she would die, or be consumed. If Andrew would do it, or just move on to a better meal. He would never know how many children she would conceive. Where she would die. Who she had seen. If she still loved him. He would never get to know who she was know, no matter how much the new her would disgust him. No matter who she would turn out to be.
Alois Trancy would always love Chelsea Lingersheen.